i'm so happy to be posting something abt life lessons i'm learning, though it's not necessary a pleasant process, at least it's a mark of growth and i guess, that's comforting to know. =)
well, as you all know, i just moved into my new place. it was a place my hub and i has been praying for when we were balloting for our place. and we're so thankful when we got it. it was really a miracle... to ballot just once and we got the place we want. have heard from many friends that they've been balloting for a flat for so long and yet they've not gotten a place yet and might have to settle for a walk-in selection instead (which usually is in the new areas like punggol and sengkang). well, not that those places are bad areas but we really wanted somewhere accessible.
and so, we got the place and in our hearts really wanted to use this place to bless our community. 3 days before we got married, PJ and PR and their 12s came down to do a house blessing/dedication. and all of us, including me and K, dedicated this house to the Lord.
finally we got married and we moved in. cleaning the house can really be a chore especially where both of us like our home to be spick and span (did i spell 'spick' correctly?). then there's me... trying to protect our place and 'preserve' it as long as possible. i didn't want to cook coz that'd mean messing up the kitchen... i didn't want to do this and do that coz it would make the place dirty and i simply can't stand dirt!!
then the question came... if people could use our place. well... my initialy answer was a straight NO. and a pretty loud one for that matter. because it's MY house, MY home and for MY use. and i started to be afraid of people who'd start asking if they could use our place for cell activities. coz my answer would be.. it's only for MY cell. *sigh*
then God spoke. in yesterday's sermon abt having compassion and showing grace and love. and a gentle probe in my heart to remind me that we were blessed so that we are empowered to bless.
this was house was indeed dedicated to the Lord. and i guess i'll have to work out the struggles within myself with God. so i guess... it is open for use. but as for how we can go about doing that, well, we'll have to work it out. i'm still very uncomfortable leaving my keys with other people other than our parents of course... but... we'll work that out.... each step, working things out with the Lord too.
opening the place would mean that K and i would have to work doubly hard to keep the place clean. well, i guess God will bless and provide when we walk in obedience. so that's the faith and trust i want to have in God. to know that He'll provide... somehow... so that this not only can be a home and haven for us.. but it can also be a place where He'll be pleased to dwell in such that His work can also be accomplished. we know at the end of the day, it's impossible to out-give God. and we know God is a God of abundance and He will provide in every way.
that's what K and i has set out to acheive... and i just wanna apologise to those whom i've said NO to.
is this a sacrifice? i guess it's a small step and a far cry from sharing in His suffering. but it's a step. so i can only pray that God continue to strengthen my faith and soften my heart.
"I want to know Christ and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in His sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead."
Philippians 3:10-11
"Now if we are children, then we are heirs - heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us."
Romans 8:17-18
but as i said, this is just a teeny weeny sacrifice. what can compare to what Christ went through? but it serves as a reminder of obedience and total surrender.
{ Monday, July 24 }