it has been quite a fruitful weekend last weekend... i attended jackie pullinger's seminar and also attended my second lesson of sol3 (standing for school of leaders).
jackie pullinger is a missionary who've been in hong kong (hk) for 40 yrs. she has been there ministering to the poor, namely the prostitutes, drug addicts and gang leaders. the testimonies are amazing. the seminar was so amazing. God really spoke with me and i'm sure with many others who attended. she reminded us again to remember the poor and she reminded me that God does have a special place in His heart for the poor and the needy. in fact, in the whole bible, especially in the old testament, it is always recorded that God will always urge the community to help the poor, orphans and widows.
"All they asked was that we should remember the poor, the very thing I was eager to do" Galatians 2:10
looking at jackie and just hearing her speak makes me realise how great our God is. how loving He is... and i think through my journey and my walk with Him i sorta forgotten that. her care for the poor is just care for the poor. and i think her ministry reflects the very essence and the very heart of God. do we care so that we can bring others the gospel or do we bring others the gospel by caring?
"Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, "Go I wish you well; keep warm and well fed", but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accomplished by action, is dead." James 2:15-17
how true... how true...
the gospel IS abt a God, who gave up everything He had, all His luxuries in heaven, all the powers He had, the same power that created heaven and earth, just to be where we are - to experience our pain, our rejection, our loneliness and our fears. that's Jesus... and the bible called him a man of sorrows, familiar with sufferings.
and when i look at myself, i truly can say that i am ashamed. ashamed of how i carried myself, how i spoke and how much i cared. i don't.
what's the point of having all these big events and having all these people come yet our heart is cold?
we have missed the point. we have missed God's message. and we have missed His heart.
how much of God's love do i really understand? as i reflected only did i realise that i've only scrapped the surface of His heart. i've not fully understood, rather, never really took the pains to.
you see, whatever we do (it's something we call ministry) must be accompanied by His compassion. if there's no compassion for the lost, i would say, forget it. don't do it. we're not here to prove any point nor are we here to do them a favour.
and in sol3, we learnt abt leadership... leadership is influence.
so how do i want to love? how do i want to lead? and i can confess today, i am afraid. i don't know what lies ahead. and that's when it calls for faith.. in the midst of our brokenness.. it's when i have run out of all my human intelligence juice then God truly manifests and awes me over and over.
i want to learn to trust Him. i want to learn to love people just like He did. He didn't love them to ask for something back. it's all about dying... dying to yourself... so that He may live in me. so that the world (ok, the world sounds a little too daunting... at least the people around me) can truly know that there is hope.
there's so much more i wanna say but that's the gist of it, which is already rather long...
just today, i was walking to my office... i saw a poor man. he's a beggar. the call came to me... i should do something... but i walked away.. coz i didn't know what to do. i remember jackie said, at least pray... so i did... i hope that God will show me what to do. if i see him again tomorrow, i'll update you...
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do you wanna know what's my childhood dream? it was to bring hope to the hopeless and healing to the dying. i wanted to become a doctor.. then i became a christian. and i found hope... but along the way, i lost sight of it.
thank you God, for showing me again... for reminding me again what drew me to You.
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thanks for tuning in.
"Preach the Gospel at all times. Use words if necessary."
Francis of Assisi
{ Monday, May 14 }