judging from the title, this is probably gonna be a long post.

i have many experiences walking with God. yesterday i just attended a career talk. when i look at the lives of the people giving the speeches... how should i put it? they're all in their late 40s, they're very experienced in the commercial world though they did take on different port folios, eg from audit to marketing to HR... or from techy to sales to teaching to HR to directorship. sadly none really talked abt changing line completely.

as i was on my way home i was sharing with hubby abt how i feel. if i should go to sales or if i should go to nursing. i told him that i told God that i can't make the decision and i told God that if He really wanted me in sales, that He'd send someone to invite me over. i also told God that if He wanted me to go to nursing, that He sent nurses into my life to tell me more abt the career. you know what? the latter happened. now i'm confused. was it a fluke? or is God testing me?

with such choices comes great sacrifices. my life wouldn't be as fixed as i'd like, ie, shift work and no fixed hours, working on weekends and holidays. my life would also be less comfortable.. i can't buy what i feel like, eat what i feel like. true, the health care sector is changing and more career opportunities are opening up there but i simply don't have the guts to do it. maybe God was really testing my passion. i don't know. i don't really dare to ask for another sign...

so i guess i'm pretty much stuck here... or maybe i'd switch much later on... major late life career change?

well, here comes the next part on my thoughts on choices....

it's not just important to choose our job... it's not just important to choose our life partner... it's also important to choose what we believe in.

what's your belief system?

well, i believe in God. i believe everything works out for the good even though it might suck at first. i believe God is always good and always in control.

that's my firm belief. so no matter what happens, i have hope. false hope some of you might say, well, at least it pulls me through and i can testify to how God has been alive in my life.

what rocks you when your down? do you give up? do you run away? do you hide? what you believe in will determine your attitude, your outlook and perspective and the way you pick yourself up. if things that happen to you in life is always by chance, how sad that would be. but if your life has a plan and purpose, would you walk in it? we can only walk in God's plan if we choose to believe that God has a plan!

i see many dejected people... they believe everyone has given up on them and so they gave up on themselves. and language doesn't go easy with them as well... they're eventually termed, the rejects of society. how sad that is. if you're at this point, where do you go from here?

so what do you believe in? if nothing at all, how abt having a go at something.

i have to say, that some belief systems are complete off-balanced and even harmful. so choose wisely.

talking abt convicts, they soon become ex-convicts and need a second-chance. it's really cool to see society giving them a second chance. and i was reminded of this song... couldn't remember the lyrics, went to look it up and almost teared while reading it...

I'm comin' home, I've done my time
Now I've got to know what is and isn't mine
If you received my letter telling you I'd soon be free
Then you'll know just what to do
If you still want me
If you still want me

Whoa, tie a yellow ribbon 'round the old oak tree
It's been three long years
Do ya still want me?
If I don't see a ribbon round the old oak tree
I'll stay on the bus
Forget about us
Put the blame on me
If I don't see a yellow ribbon round the old oak tree

Bus driver, please look for me
'cause I couldn't bear to see what I might see
I'm really still in prison
And my love, she holds the key
A simple yellow ribbon's what I need to set me free
I wrote and told her please

Whoa, tie a yellow ribbon round the old oak tree
It's been three long years
Do ya still want me?
If I don't see a ribbon round the old oak tree
I'll stay on the bus
Forget about us
Put the blame on me
If I don't see a yellow ribbon round the old oak tree

Now the whole damned bus is cheerin'
And I can't believe I see
A hundred yellow ribbons round the old oak tree
I'm comin' home

funny how this song came to mind as i was planning to write this entry.. and yesterday i was thinking abt forgiveness... and when i was reading the papers, the guy who sang this, tony orlando, is coming to singapore to hold a concert... and the concert is called the yellow ribbon world tour.... celebrating the 35th anniversary of penning this song.

forgiveness is a wonderful thing. i still remember sharing abt it with my girls. but one thing i forget to mention.. is that though we forgive, it still does take time to build that trust up again. i guess that's what makes it difficult for people who've wronged us before. anyway, that's just a side thought...

as of today, i'm 20 weeks pregnant! praise the Lord! i'm still waiting to find out the gender of my baby. i should know next saturday when i go for my detailed ob scan. =)

in life, there're ups and there're downs. that are what we call seasons. do you recognise the season? are you picking up the lessons?

{ Friday, August 29 }